One of my favorite books, a tiny little paper pamphlet really, is Your Power to Say No (In
association with Amazon.comall the books recommended by Don't Fall Until You See the Whites of Their Lies.) by Vernon Howard. I read that book hundreds of times.

"It is a weak yes that lures people into trouble and it is a powerful NO that can keep you safe."

"People want your yes as a first step toward getting whatever else they want from you."

"They want my yes for their own gain, which will result in my loss."

"There is no end of tricks people use to prevent you from coming back with a firm and final NO. They try to make you feel guilty, they appeal to your loyalty, they warn you of danger unless you agree. They shout, plead, weep, threaten, coax, lie, accuse, pretend, promise, whine, shock, laugh, divert, rage, grieve, demand, persist."

"All these tricks collapse in defeat before the single reply of NO. Remember, NO is a high form of intelligence backed up by Reality itself. Reality wants you to be free, while hoaxers want you to be theirs."

"As examples you may be harmfully saying yes because:

1. You feel NO might seem unfriendly.
2. It relieves nervous indecision.
3. You fear a domineering person.
4. It avoids your anxious explanations.
5. You have always said yes.
6. Someone promised you a reward.
7. It makes you seem kindly.
8. You want to be accepted.
9. Everyone else is saying yes.
10. You want to avoid unpleasant reactions."

"Say NO. Make the necessary contact and resign. Just like that. Do it even if you feel nervous about it. Don't listen to your timidity. Do what is right. Do you know what you are doing! You are getting your life back!"

"The second step occurs when you yield yourself to something higher than your own intellect. This is the same as saying that you permit the spirit of Truth to enter and guide your life. This superior spirit gives total power to your NO, just as a sudden charge of electricity gives life to a television screen. It is really this higher force that says NO for you...and what you know inwardly is that the higher power sees what is right for you in every circumstance. It then acts and speaks thru you for your own benefit and safety."

"Since those who request something from you hope for a yes they may react in a negative manner to your NO. But any anger or sarcasm on their part is their problem."

"You are never required to answer hostility."

"No one knows more than you what is best for you."

"Just because someone demands something from you it does not mean that he has a right to it. In fact, his very demand is his disqualification. An angry demander is a desperate person who refuses to do his own inner work of self-development, and you only add to his dependency by yielding to his demands."

"A beneficial NO is automatically followed by an equally beneficial yes. To say NO to people who try to impose themselves upon you is to say yes to the pleasure of living your own life. When you decline to accept society's subtle bribes you agree to stronger inner integrity. Saying NO to the destructive excitements of the world is the same as saying yes to the security of a sane mind."